ORBzine - 2000.12 Cinema Reviews

ORBzine Cinema Reviews December 2000

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Dinosaur
This is yet another sickly-sweet childrens tale of anthromorphosised Jurassic-period creatures with human-type personalities. This time the creatures are CGI, and very convincing it is too. The combination of cinematography and soundtrack during the scenes where the herd crosses the desert is phenomenal.
DB Sweeney voices the hero [a dinosaur raised by lemurs], while Julia Margules [E.R.] is the love interest. Ossie Davis voices one of the lemurs.
The moral of the story is quite stupid, really, The pack leader urges his followers to cross the desert quickly, to avoid dying of thirst or being eaten by predators. The hero disagrees .. and by flukey luck the ending supports him!
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Urban Legends: Final Cut
Yes, after Cherry Falls we get yet ANOTHER slasher flick. A serial killer is wiping out american teenagers - original, huh? This time it's the campus of a film school that plays host to the goings-on.
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Red Planet
In the year 2050 Earth's atmosphere is dying, so attempts are made to terraform Mars. Something goes wrong, and a team of astronauts are sent out to find out why.
For some reason the leader is the babelicious Carrie Ann Moss . One assumes the Powers That Be kept their fingers crossed that nobody would impregnate her during the 9-month trip there, or the 9-month trip back. Her team includes Val Kilmer and Tom Sizemore, who last crewed together under Robert De Niro in Heat, and Terrence Stamp [Chancellor Vallorum in Star Wars: Phantom Menace].
The script is by Chuck Pfarrer, an ex-SEAL whose previous SF credits include Dark Man , the comic follow-up to John Carpenter's The Thing and the much-slated Virus. As typical with Pfarrer's work, there's lots of derring-do. Moss is a regular Ripley, straight out of a James Cameron film, and Kilmer kicks ass too.
The away team [ie the males] are trapped on the surface of Mars, and have to trek across the desert to find safety. They are stalked by a psycho robot, a CGI version of Muffy the Daggett from Battlestar Galactica. Moss is stuck on the ship, clad in a wet t-shirt, and thinking warm thoughts of Kilmer.
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How The Grinch Stole Christmas
This is a live-action version of the childrens' book by US author Dr Seuss . The title character is played by Jim Carrey, who is completely unrecognisable under the makeup. The story is narrated by Anthony Hopkins, soon to be on-screen again in Hannibal. The REAL star is the little girl
The tale from the book is only the last third of the film. The first hour or so is the backstory that introduces the Grinch [a hairy green grouch who lives above the town of Whoville] and his motivation [he hates Xmas because ... well, it involves his love interest, Christine Baranski ].
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6th Day, The
Yet another Arnie Flick, and like End of Days this is pretty much a rehash of his earlier [and better] works. The director is Roger Spottiswood , best known for Tomorrow Never Dies .
This film resembles Arnie's previous film Total Recall . Michael Rooker [Bone Collector] is cast in the Michael Ironside role - but he is NO Michael Ironside! He has a token black guy and a token babe [ Sarah Wynter ] as sidekicks, too. It seems like the writer envisioned a character similar to Sharon Stone 's in Total Recall , while the director wanted Hudson Leick 's portrayal of Liz Friedman in Hercules: The Legendary Journeys .
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TITLE & REVIEW	Click on the supplier's logo to get your own copy!
Dinosaur This is yet another sickly-sweet childrens tale of anthromorphosised Jurassic-period creatures with human-type personalities. This time the creatures are CGI, and very convincing it is too. The combination of cinematography and soundtrack during the scenes where the herd crosses the desert is phenomenal. DB Sweeney voices the hero [a dinosaur raised by lemurs], while Julia Margules [E.R.] is the love interest. Ossie Davis voices one of the lemurs. The moral of the story is quite stupid, really, The pack leader urges his followers to cross the desert quickly, to avoid dying of thirst or being eaten by predators. The hero disagrees .. and by flukey luck the ending supports him! Search This Site
Urban Legends: Final Cut Yes, after Cherry Falls we get yet ANOTHER slasher flick. A serial killer is wiping out american teenagers - original, huh? This time it's the campus of a film school that plays host to the goings-on. Search This Site
Red Planet In the year 2050 Earth's atmosphere is dying, so attempts are made to terraform Mars. Something goes wrong, and a team of astronauts are sent out to find out why. For some reason the leader is the babelicious Carrie Ann Moss . One assumes the Powers That Be kept their fingers crossed that nobody would impregnate her during the 9-month trip there, or the 9-month trip back. Her team includes Val Kilmer and Tom Sizemore, who last crewed together under Robert De Niro in Heat, and Terrence Stamp [Chancellor Vallorum in Star Wars: Phantom Menace]. The script is by Chuck Pfarrer, an ex-SEAL whose previous SF credits include Dark Man , the comic follow-up to John Carpenter's The Thing and the much-slated Virus. As typical with Pfarrer's work, there's lots of derring-do. Moss is a regular Ripley, straight out of a James Cameron film, and Kilmer kicks ass too. The away team [ie the males] are trapped on the surface of Mars, and have to trek across the desert to find safety. They are stalked by a psycho robot, a CGI version of Muffy the Daggett from Battlestar Galactica. Moss is stuck on the ship, clad in a wet t-shirt, and thinking warm thoughts of Kilmer. Search This Site
How The Grinch Stole Christmas This is a live-action version of the childrens' book by US author Dr Seuss . The title character is played by Jim Carrey, who is completely unrecognisable under the makeup. The story is narrated by Anthony Hopkins, soon to be on-screen again in Hannibal. The REAL star is the little girl The tale from the book is only the last third of the film. The first hour or so is the backstory that introduces the Grinch [a hairy green grouch who lives above the town of Whoville] and his motivation [he hates Xmas because ... well, it involves his love interest, Christine Baranski ]. Search This Site
6th Day, The Yet another Arnie Flick, and like End of Days this is pretty much a rehash of his earlier [and better] works. The director is Roger Spottiswood , best known for Tomorrow Never Dies . This film resembles Arnie's previous film Total Recall . Michael Rooker [Bone Collector] is cast in the Michael Ironside role - but he is NO Michael Ironside! He has a token black guy and a token babe [ Sarah Wynter ] as sidekicks, too. It seems like the writer envisioned a character similar to Sharon Stone 's in Total Recall , while the director wanted Hudson Leick 's portrayal of Liz Friedman in Hercules: The Legendary Journeys . Search This Site