[Chariots of War III]
The intro video is taken from Hercules, and is entitled Jerkules the Legendary Moron.
The announcer introduces the Wild Men of "Xena".
.
This was Karl and Ted's first time on stage together.
They usually play God of Love and King of Morons -
but in the serious episodes they were King of Evil and
Mr Punishment.
If you wrote you autobiography, as Bruce Campbell did,
what would you title it?
Karl - My Life As A Dog
Ted - How to be unemployed for most of your life and never earn a dime
Bruce Campbell's titles apparently include Confessions of a B-Grade Movie Actor and The Chin That Killed Hollywood.
Ted, in the episode "Fins, Femmes & Gems"
was it painful to slide down the tree?
It looks worse than it is:
it's shot in reverse motion, and Ted wore a harness.
Ted had a stunt-double who was good and physically fit.
Like you but completely different
Ted, did Tim Omundson ever get his revenge on you?
Ted reminds us all that he set up Tim on the first read-through.
Tim hasn't got his own back ... yet.
Ted and Karl never played tricks on each other ...
- Except that trout I put in your underwear.
- I found that kinda enjoyable.
Ted used to alter Lucy Lawless and Renee's script instructions.
Ted, will your cabaret act with Bruce Campbell be given a video release?
It's not on video yet?!
Ted tells us that they do the worst mind-reading act in the world.
A lady from the audience passes a note to Karl for Ted. Karl reads it out to the audience. It's from a 16-year-old German girl, whose birthday it was.
According to Karl, the girl was a Ted groupie and invited him to dinner. There's a lovely little Scottish restuarant just around the corner. It's called ... McDonalds!
Ted gives us his example of a Xena yell.
.
If we had to choose, which big blockbuster should we see -
"Spider-Man" or "Lord Of The Rings"?
Ted plugs his brother's film, Spiderman,
due for release May 2002.
Karl calls Ted Daddy Longlegs. Ted replies At least I ain't the midget! This leads on to a slo-mo fist-fight between them.
Ted - I'd see them both. Even if Karl weren't in it? ESPECIALLY if Karl isn't in it.
.
.
Ted, did you enjoy working with Andrew Divoff in the film "Wishmaster"?
Ted didn't work with him.
Ted did the film as a favour to Bob Kurtzman [K&B guy].
Ted only worked on the film for three days. It was not a stereotypical role for him. He yells obscenities at a crane driver, until the guy drops a giant crate on him.
This morning Greg Lee stripped for at least 45 minutes.
Will you two do the same?
I think that's a big no.
Or a real small no.
Karl, since Pierce Brosnan has announced he is stepping down,
would you like to be the new James Bond?
Someone suggests that Ted would be a good Bond film, a mad scientist.
You can be Miss Moneypenny
What is your most memorable Alex Tydings moment?
There are children present.
Gee, no, I can't say.
Every time she takes her robe off to act! Anyone who can act in skimpy underwear in freezing cold New Zealand ...
Did you steal anything from the set?
Coffee sachets, and sometimes wore socks home accidentally.
Ted still has the Joxer costume, but Cupid's was sold when the props were auctioned off. Ted hated the Joxer hat, and Karl hated Caesar's big plumey helmet. It made him feel like a plonker.
Ted - What's a plonker?
Karl - I'll show you later on.
The problem with the costumes is that someone forgot to put a fly in. Once you're in, you're in - for twelve hours!
Cupid had big wings glued to his back,
so he couldn't get into the portaloo.
Ted - They frighten me. I'd wait.
Ted tells about when he wore the Henrietta makeup in Evil Dead - about twenty years previously. He wore up to twenty appliances on his face - it took six hours to fit them on the first day, and four hours on the subsequent days. He had to be on the set for 1AM!
In Xena: Warrior Princess, Ted wore contacts. He took up three seats on the makeup bus; he used tissues, solution, and went through five or six lenses just to get one in. People must have thought he was on drugs.
Karl told a story about one time he bumped into Hudson Leick on set. She wore an eye-mask that morning, and advised Karl to try one. He did, and his eyes were so RED!
Ted and Karl decided to ad-lib some movie scenes. The type and language of the film were decided at random from the audience's suggestions.
They tried a horror movie in Chinese. Ted was a vampire, and Karl was the victim.
The second movie was a war/action film, in Swiss. Strictly speaking Switzerland has three languages - German, French and Italian. However, Ted used muppet Swedish!
Characterise the other "Xena" characters in two words.
What are your three favourite words?
That's lunch, everybody!
That's a wrap!
The announcer suggests Get off stage!
What do you miss about working on "Xena"?
The guys will miss the cool country.
New Zealanders have cool terms for everything - they use pozzie for position and mozzie for mosquito.
Ted thinks they'll miss him more than he misses them.
Ted, are you my father?
Karl tells us of his first day on set in New Zealand.
A local crew-member tells him Watch out for the Whettas.
Karl - What's that?
Kiwi - You'll find out.
Karl went into his trailer.
He heard a noise, looked round, and saw a giant grasshopper,
sitting there watching him.
Karl will also miss - The pay cheque!
Karl changed his mind, and said he would miss working with such talented people.
He went on to name the entire cast of Xena except for Ted Raimi!
Type in another stars name and link them together!
Need help?
