The Props are outlandish instead of medieval.
Comic relief is provided by a kiddie emperor (an oriental) and his servant, a fat Joxer. Somehow they can walk faster than Sonja's horse, even when she takes shortcuts!
This is lo-budget trash, courtesy of Dino de Laurentis .
This was made by Hallmark in 2002, so it has good SPFX and Henson animatronics. It consists of two episodes of 90 minutes, made for TV. This is the US version of the Hans Christian Anderson tale. But at least the main parts are female (Gerda, the Princess, the robber girl) as he intended.
Dartagnan (Michael York - ), John Rhys Davies ( Lord of the Rings ) and Christopher Cazenove ( Knight's Tale ) are retired musketeers. Dartagnan's daughter ( Suzy Amis - she apparently starred in a popular glossy UK TV drama named Footballers' Wives) becomes a musketeer. She is totally wooden, not even that attractive, and no comparison with Sophie Marceau .
Her mission is to help the Spanish Infanta marry the French King. Cardinal Mazarin (Gerard Depardieu - Man in the Iron Mask ) and Natassja Kinski conspire against them. The other villain has a goatee and wears lots of black leather.
This was produced by Robert Halmi jnr, and features lots of slavic actors (indicating it was made in Central Europe). Also, it is ironic that Depardieu, the only Frenchman in the cast, plays an Italian.
The cast includes a veteran of Oz.
Bill Sadler ( Roswell ) pops up in a supporting role.
Rollerball, the most popular sport, is a full-contact ball-game on roller skates. Houston are world champs, defending in a home games against Madrid. James Caan ( Misery ) is the most popular team's captain. He also has to balance his girlfriend ( Pamela Hensley ) and wife ( Maud Adams )!
Ralph Richardson is a tech running an AI supercomputer. Burt Kwouk ( Water Margin ) is a Japanese doctor. Other supporting players are Rick le Parmentier ( Star Wars IV: A New Hope ), Shane Rimmer ( Diamonds Are Forever ) and Moses Gunn.
Paul Newman is the company's evil chairman. Other familiar faces include Charles Durning ( ) and Roy Brocksmith ( Total Recall (1990) ).
This was produced and directed by the Coen brothers .
The gang help Laurel and Hardy vs Bigfoot!
The gang help The Harlem Globetrotters vs Redbeard's Ghost!
What's New, Scooby Doo is a weekly cartoon. The gang attend a ren-fair at Glasborough castle.
It basically turns into a Die Hard scenario (rogue borg vs evil Corporation).
If Mary's side had won, democracy would not exist in the English-speaking world - if anywhere! Contraception and abortion are wrong. But do not worry - AIDS is Jevovah's punishment for unwanted pregnancy!
Daniella Nardini has a small role as Mary Gordon of Huntley.
Beryl Reid gets cursed, and she is the biker hero's mum.
Don Coscarelli actually produced Phantasm IV, though it has not got a release in the UK yet.
Katie Holmes is a local girl.
Props include a 2005 newspaper (there is no Internet - this was made in 1992). The plot relies on coincidence!
In a futuristic society, city folk (Peter Gallagher and wife) meet savages (who own old books) from the reservation.
In the future, having kids is illegal. Brainwashing takes place in a Clockwork Orange chair, and TV adverts (super-liminal!) are a satire on media feeding frenzy.
The hero is a journalist, and his wife is the Charmed ones' mother.
The story has bookends (in the year 2029 CE), but the main story is flashback to 1993.
The hero cannot be bothered to hire Laurence Fishbourne ( Event Horizon ) as his sex negotiator, so he tries to retrieve his sexbot from the bandit-filled wilderness.
There are some nice cinematography and stunts (especially the rocket duel). The cast includes Brion James ( Knight Rider 2010 ), Marshall Bell ( Total Recall ), Tim Thomerson ( Trancers ), Ben Johnson.
The hero's choice is to save the damsel or liberated woman (who falls for him instantly).
Marian is now head nun at Kirklys Abbey. Robin and John join with Will Scarlett (Denholm Elliot - Raiders of the Lost Ark ) and Friar Tuck (Ronnie Barker) against Sheriff Robert Shaw ( Jaws ). This allows Shaw and Connery to duel for the first time since From Russia with Love .
The fact that the main characters are aging heroes is not very Hollywood. These veterans deliver expert performances. And the ending itself is not Hollywood-style at all.
The opening music and exposition and credits are disappointing. It is aimed at kids - not an action movie.
There is no fire dept, coastguard, etc - the ThunderBirds protect the entire world. The Cops only turn up after it is over.
The Evil Hood (Ben Kingsley - Gandhi Prince of Persia ) arranges to get Mr Tracey (Bill Paxton - Terminator, Aliens ), Brains (Anthony Edwards - Revenge of the Nerds, Top Gun) and the other grown-ups out of the way. The only thing that stands between Hood controlling the ThunderBirds is ... a trio of annoying children!
Parker is great, but Lady Penelope ( Sophia Myles ) is at least ten years too young. And since when did anyone on the show have psychic powers? Where did Brain's son come from? Or Hood's henchmen? What is the Bank of London (it must be tiny if there is only one branch)? And why mention Mrs Tracey? There is waaay too much backstory here.
Elisha Cuthbert time travels to 1881 - where the tale descends into teen melodrama.
Timothy Busfield (West Wing) has a supporting role.
The Bride (Eva is feminine for Eve?) and Sting have a Pygmalion relationship. But they have a Psychic link with the monster (Victor?), who is in a Budapest circus run by Ringmaster Alexi Sayle ( Dr Who ).
Familiar faces include Clancy Brown, Quentin Crisp, Tim Spall.
This led to a TV show.
Kari Matchett wakes up in an all-white room with six doors. If all this is familiar, it should be - it is a sequel to the previous Cube film, with an all-new cast including Seymour from La Femme Nikita. They are trapped in time-dilating super-maze with fancy CGI traps.
Basically, a group of Canadian TV actors wander around a confined set and begin to turn against each other. For example, Geraint Wyn Davies ( Forever Knight ) is a suspicious type who somehow got a knife through security. He must have hidden it the one place they would never look ...
This was based on a stage play. This explains the great dialogue and witty repartee, such as:
Henri - When pigs sprout wings
Eleanor - There'll be pork in the trees come morning!
Jonathan Rhys Myers ( Gormenghast ) is King Philip of France
They head an all-star cast (Richard Chamberlain, Ali McGraw , etc) - shocking how many famous faces are in this utter B-Movie!
Quartermain's party is being tracked by Russians, who want to seize the Mines for the Czar!
Naomi Watts is the protagonist, a female journalist (and single mother) investigating an urban myth, the killer videotape. As she digs deeper she discovers the mysterious Death Tape of the girl, Samarra. Brian Cox ( Troy, Manhunter ) is Samarra's father, according to her birth certificate ...
This lacks the low-key approach of the original. Extra scariness is injected in at regular intervals, to make it more predictable for the audience. However, this is still better than the average US horror movie. Director Gore Verbinski and writer Ehren Kruger ( Scream 3 ) did a pretty good job, adding added a couple of scenes that were not in the original film but certaily add something. The first is when Watts looks out her window and sees that every neighbour has a TV in their apartment. Second is the TV in Samarra's cell - it was both her companion and mirror!
We get to see a Teri Hatcher lookalike topless.
This is basically a fish-out-of-water romcom, but nicely done.
Robert Vaughn ( Man From Uncle ) is a scary politician.
The protagonist discovers he has super-sperm ( Toyah Wilcox is the Doctor), so he inseminates women. This dubious Hero whores himself inside the Albert clock - Belfast irony, since it was once the place where female streetwalkers plied their trade.
This is the stereotypical Belfast, where every house has political flags and a photo of the Pope or the Queen. James Nesbitt ( The Hobbit ) is a Loyalist thug (for humorous effect).
Irish actresses Bronagh Gallagher ( Phantom Menace ) and Pauline McGlynne (Father Ted) also have supporting roles.
The film is Shakespearian, let down by dodgy CGI.
The Crab makes her food taste magically good.
Even as rom-coms go, this is Ultra lightweight fluff!
In August 1945, the hero (a RAAF Flight Lieutenant, their best pilot) takes a secret cargo to Bora Bora.
Because of their Villainous boss, the hero and a babe go on a quest. They must retrieve a Mystical Artefact (like Indiana Jones).